R O O F T O P S

That Spark

One of my soul friends wrote something that touched my core today. Uncomfortably so...and I'm glad. This is my heart in words. I shared with her that it captivated me and she responded with "...then this is for you and also me. A love letter to every moment... May they be used to hand make our futures!! xoxo..." I feel that there's so much within this love letter. I'll be meditating on this one for quite some time. Have a read. Let it resonate where it will. & then go check out her website! She's most incredibly talented in her photography, her art, her writings and she's published!

We are all looking for that spark,
that one idea,
that one decision,
that will revolutionize our world.
Our spirit.
Our relationships.
Our career.
When we find that spark,
we start making choices.
New choices.
Different choices than before.
We grow immensely or heal rapidly.
That spark is the one that lights the inner fire.
The thing about a spark is in the presence of void it has no power.
Substance and Being must be Present.
The spark must have something to light....Which means that this spark changes your world only when you have a world to change.
A culmination of everything you have learned up until this moment is set in motion.
Set ablaze.
Each shift, each opening has prepared the ground for harvest,
Each log and leaf prepares for the roaring fire.
Leaving an unhealthy relationship.
Quitting that job you hate.
Going to therapy.
Moving on. Or up. Or too.
Starting your dream project.
Having this baby.
Saying yes to whatever you said no to before when you were too scared.
All are big shifts.
But really they are a culmination of little shifts,
little shifts that have been opening ones soul for the leap.
Which is to say:
all of life matters.
The small connections.
The little sentences of inspiration.
That act of kindness.
That act of grace.
That act of selflessness.
The choice to remain present.
The choice to love yourself anyway.
To keep getting up and trying.
Each moment matters if you want the spark that will change your world.
Because it's all tinder.
You won't know which day brings the big change to your door.
But it will come.
It always does to those who collect stick by stick,
moment by moment, placing them together as an altar.
Prepare and gather enough to withstand the hours and seasons of waiting.
So when the spark comes... the fire will roar.
The fire won't die out.
The fire will burn all that does not belong.
www.aglobalwalk.com (Ashley Fincham)

Accompanying Photo By Ashe Arends Photography

Feature: Shine On Inc. // Finding Rhythm: Thoughts On Well-Being and Creativity

So I met this amazing couple a few weeks ago, "The Bergamot," as they are known. They just so happened to play a show at my house for my birthday celebration...but that's a story for another time. Well, the amazingly talented Jillian Speece and I connected that weekend as kindred spirits. Jillian is incredibly talented and skilled in her music as well as in her writing. I follow a couple blogs of hers and one in particular called Shine On Inc. // The Art of Living Brightly. Last week Jillian wrote a post on well-being and creativity that motivated me to ask her if I could share her post on my own blog. The topics of being well and being creative are probably two of the most discussed topics by myself and most of the people I know around me. But, they aren't as often discussed in conjunction. This combined topic has been one that I have discussed with several friends recently and one that I have also spent time processing through on my own.

The assumed lifestyle for creatives is usually one that involves a lot of sacrifice. I spent a good 6 years sacrificing sleep, nutrition, exercise, and my social life. Not all together, and not all at once, but there was a definite give and take depending on the season. By the end of the long journey towards two degrees in the arts in 4 years I was burnt. I took an unintended year of recovery. Without realizing it I chose solitude. I needed to withdraw from being creative so that I could find myself again and rebuild some of those foundations that I had neglected. I learned a lot during that year and part of that was focusing on my own well-being and then dabbling in a bit of creativity here and there. I'm an artist of course. I need an outlet. In any case, Jillian's post inspired by Tom Rath's book Eat Move Sleep: How Small Choices Lead to Big Changes, directly addresses the challenges that we face as artists with living healthy lifestyles and just how important it is to rise to the challenge of living well. It's a lifestyle. It's a choice. It's a challenge. Altogether, I'm convinced that it's worth it.

Click below to read Jillian's post!

Finding Rhythm: Thoughts On Well-Being and Creativity

• • • It Is Well With My Soul • • •

Stumpy Lake, Chesapeake, Virginia [6.28.15]

'Twas quite the scene last night. Although what I was able to capture is quite beautiful, I am glad to say that the photo doesn't do the whole sunset justice. Because in the moment it was captivating & that's what I want to remember most.

The Run Away Girl

"Can we just run away?" She asked so innocently. 

Her heart shone through her eyes; a look of desire for adventure and a hope for new horizons to embrace. 

"I'm alive and I want the earth to know it." 

Jo I Miss Her So

Dearest Jordan, I don't know how exactly our friendship came to be.

Fate. I suppose it was. Regardless, my dear, you are an inspiration.

(Just a little reminder from January 2015)

"This weekend I took a trip some with friends to Lynchburg. While many of my friends took to the snowy mountains peaks to board I spent time exploring the burg with Jordan, attended my first hockey game, decided I like hockey, drank lots of coffee, took lots of pictures and enjoyed just kinda going with the flow of the weekend. Time spent in Lynchburg was therapeutic in a lot of ways. Although my body may be exhausted from staying up till 3 am and getting up at 9 am a couple times (way past my bedtime) it was well worth it. My heart and spirit are well rested and encouraged by talks of dreams, passions, faith, insecurities, strengths, growth and the ever exciting unknown full of endless possibility. My heart sighed a lot this weekend and reminded me that releasing control should be more of a constant in life."

Back Seat Reflections

I’ve expressed before how I often times surprise myself with the wisdom that comes out of my mouth. A lot of times this happens when I am sitting down with a friend or my mentee and I am looking to encourage them or I’m asked to give my opinion on something. I came slumping into this current week off of the last week where I was left pretty emotionally, mentally, and physically drained. This past Saturday provided me with the opportunity to go to therapy…aka I got to hit the road to South Florida for 5 days. Travel may not always be cheaper than therapy, but for me it certainly seems to do the trick; and I quite enjoy getting to hit the road rather than laying on a fainting couch amidst all the junk I may be working through. I’m not running from problems but putting some space between myself and the place that often is associated with them. 

Usually I am on the road by myself and I have found that most of my travels provide me with the opportunity to gain a greater perspective on where I am in life and my spiritual walk. This time I hit the road with 4 of my co-workers for a conference in West Palm Beach, Florida. And the angel chorus sang. I had my hand at the wheel a couple times and then spent most of it as a passenger passing the time. I write to you from the backseat of a 7 passenger mini van, cruising 95N through North Carolina. The sky is a bit heavy in places and the trees line the left side of the highway as pastures line the right. I simply adore my time on the road, it’s the place where I can remember doing most of my daydreaming as a child. I wish it would rain so I could race raindrops down my window as I once did. 

I spent most of my time Sunday through Wednesday in sessions for work learning more about my place in higher education as an Christian Enrollment Counselor. I took the teachings as things that I could of course apply to my current work but also saw opportunity to take from these sessions tools and learns that I could use in the future for whatever I end up doing with my life. In my spare time I did some reading. I honestly wish working everyday was broken up into more than two parts of the day, before lunch, and after lunch. I think breaking up the day into sessions would make me a bit more productive and then maybe I could even suggest breaks for tea and coffee and maybe a good 30 minutes break for pleasure reading. Something to break up the monotonous schedule that is working in an office 8 to 5. 

I hit a break-through moment on Tuesday just around dinner time. After my last session of the day I gave my girl Kadi a call because I would be meeting up with her in Savannah, Georgia as we made our trek back to Virginia Beach. As we were catching up over the phone I told her that I felt like I was under some serious spiritual attack last week. (Side-note: Just got the most glorious whiff of burning brush…one of my favorite things). We talked more in depth about it but I will just skip to the conclusion I came to with the help of this beautiful friend of mine. I hadn’t given permission or space for failure in a certain area of my life. The usual assumption is for anything you want to be successful you need complete control or as much as possible to see that whatever it is becomes a success. If you are unsure of something wouldn’t you want to have as much control over it and it’s influencers as possible? Well, the hard part is when you try to control something that you can’t. This causes major anxiety because there’s no formula, there aren’t any guides or step by step instructions to guide you along. The unexpected will happen. It must. There’s no way to be fully prepared, and like I said in my last post, I wouldn’t want to live a life fully prepared. 

So here I am in the midst of the revelation that all of my anxieties I had were because I was trying to figure out how to fix something that’s not broken, prevent things I cannot foresee, mend the past when it’s long gone, or control something that is doing just fine on it’s own. BOOM. What. Yeah. Anxiety can influence one to take control, and it can become a result of the attempt. It’s pretty much something I think we all deal with at one point or another. This rings especially true for all those detail oriented and planning people out there. You know who you are. I know I am. Sometimes planning and details can get in the way of faith and I have definitely been challenged in this over the years. I have a pretty good grasp on not being able to control the future that is a year down the road or more but have more of that struggle of control over the present and closer future. Again, it all comes back to opportunity. This time, I’m sitting down to document my failure to fix, prevent, mend, and control which in turn will lead to stronger faith. I think I would rather have a faith that is stronger than my own control.